i looked into the small room
at the front of the house
he was sitting very quietly
in the corner
he smiled warmly
and i sat down across from him
we sat there for quite a while
our breath was synchronized
nothing else was needed
someone else told me that
he often liked to squeeze
into tight corners
blending with the wall
if you took time to observe this
you might only notice an eye blink
or a slight nose twitch
that was enough for many minutes
or many years
much later i heard of his sudden passing
i was surprised to hear he was a cat
apparently he didn`t know i was a man
( for Max )
the tears flow constantly
they will not stop
the tears fall endlessly
there is no respite
the source of the tears is hidden
silence is lost in the cries
all those bodies
nothing can bring balance
tragic insanity cannot be explained
everywhere we are reminded of our failure
at the end of this long century
perhaps some hope
there is no right; we must begin our search
digging through the ashes of decades
tears have almost stopped
more bodies fall and snap
tears overflow
into another waiting crevice
the president mimes horror
he raises his golf club and swings
tries to pretend extreme sorrow
an entire city turns its back
on counterfeit mourning
the president is absent from his body
as jobless crowds of people
scramble for food
search for meager amounts of money
the secretary of state
stages lavish dinners for
fat diplomats and fat wives
bodies continue to fall and rot
bodies are piled in block-long trucks
as mothers moan for daughters` deaths
as fathers see their wives and children falter
the virus is merciless
the virus has no boundaries
promises for food
promises for money
children fall asleep
in the arms of hunger
the old and feeble wait
for the hand of help
in the distance congressmen
congratulate themselves for praise
senators advertise their glory
bills are proposed and forgotten
the virus plows fields of death
the virus clothes itself in mystery
all the pledges that are sung each year
fall upon faces of disbelief
all the promises that stare into emptiness
drop and crumble into nothing
suffering is ignored
death is for the poor
the heroes are the doctors, the nurses
who stare into the face of death
the assistants who sweat into the arms of danger
who forget sleep and continue to move
the courageous workmen are pushing carts
everyone cleans everything all day
this is the century for never ending litanies
constant tears save our souls
endless crying save our souls
all these bodies god have mercy
the edge of insanity mary help
for all our failures jesus help us
an ounce of hope bless us buddha
the absent president, give him understanding, food for the poor,
lead us lord for all politicians, show them light jobs for the
jobless understanding for the white house, open their hearts
for all the fallen bodies, lead them lord for the troops of healing,
endless mercy for the old and helpless, lead them lord for
the smash the virus strength oh jesus
dissolve the virus strength oh buddha
drown the virus strength oh god
burn the virus squash them mary
may the virus leave may the virus explode may the virus disappear
death to the virus death to the virus death to the virus death to the
virus
that very old, old tree
in front of marcia's house
she shakes all her leaves
when the wind blows fast
speaks with many tongues
speaks to all things
in bernal heights
several years past
she almost lost her living
during fierce, rainy windstorms
her branches creaked
and began to crack
marcia saw the danger
jumped into the fury without fear
tied the branches together
so the tree could stay upright
an important being was saved
when marcia passes by
the tree sings thousands of gratitudes
and dances hundreds of chinese dragon parades
there is a bond beyond wood, beyond flesh
that old tree tells many tales
but none so true
as the tree and the woman
above my bed there hangs a quilt
of mostly shining silk
made by my grandmother
from pieces of dresses, scarves and ties
made with farmer’s hands
strong fingers
that could stitch
until the light of day moved to darkness
many squares from many lives
energy left from countless moments
holding times of joy and sadness
squares from old worn material
above my bed there hangs a quilt
of bold designs and faded pastels
when i lie down and sink into my body
everything moves to quiet and gone
the quilt doesn’t know this
doesn’t know that i am there
i listen to the words of the pieces
thoughts of ties, scarves, dresses
my grandmother’s loving eyes are there
my grandfather’s sweat lingers
different shades resurrected
worn water colors
flow into a magnificent pastiche
reflecting several decades
a melange of many moods
the treasure was handed to me in an old plastic bag
when it touched my hand
it became an heirloom
she smiled as she handed it to me
“i have only one request—
no cat shall sleep on it.”
the next evening
when the quilt covered my bed
our cat, Lacey,
already claimed it as her own
this was the time to believe
this was the time to search
those who trusted their thoughts
those who were sure of soul
those who cried in their emptiness
there was nothing as no belief
one person cried aloud
another knelt in the tears
another prostrated helplessly
one by one they accepted
some kind of belief
they all faced the east
they all began to flow together
their was nothing else to do
they all opened their hearts
they were unaware of their deed
it was the only way to survive
the spirits continued to chant
in the east a dim light
began to spread toward love
surrender to the sun
the rising sun
embrace the healing
the pulse of everyone was touched
the moon it is
so bright, bright, bright
planet flare is everywhere
stars are chasing all the glimmer
like a magic light, light, light
shadows on the moon are giants
walking to the milky way
no more time to sit and stare
jump into the air, air, air
universe is anywhere
bright, light, air
air, light, bright
bright, air, light
i saw your special self fly by
grabbed your flapping wings
as we lifted above the trees
you opened a wide smile
guessing it might be me
singing a song of celebration
hoping that we could dance
through sparkling clouds
we
headed
toward
a rainbow
you wiggled and i lost
hold
tumbled onto the rainbow
slid along its
glorious arch
i heard you laugh
as i landed on your birthday
i dreamt i slept
upon lilacs
and all around
was the smell of purple
i thought it would vanish
if even one thought should stray
i dreamt i slept
within lilacs
rosey flowers stroked my hand
and kissed softness
upon
my lips
sing your song oh blessed one
the air was filled
with light bright petals
my senses burst with ecstasy
the far-off city
moaned with grief
the world was deep
in crying
i could not run away
i dreamt i slept beneath lilacs
the song stuck in my brain
i turned to touch the lilacs
i turned to touch the pain
the lilacs disappeared
they melted into fear
it`s just a glass of water
with lemon
throw it away
the lemon giggled
the glass was silent
the water was angry
don`t they realize
what we are
the source of all thoughts
we are the egg and the chicken
the chicken and the egg
everything can be found here
it will happen but
so many centuries have dissolved
we must be patient we know
walk away, walk away
i can feel the spirits
all around me
it’s very crowded but
we all move
are we walking
toward the vast space?
the open carpet of stars?
it’s very frightening
but i’m told i’m going home
it feels as though i’m
walking away from
all that i know
i look behind
for someone to help
t here’s no one
t here
it’s a vast void
thoughts are falling
from my brain
disappearing disappearing
walkaway
walkaway
